Become A Chameleon In Your Next Negotiation

by drjim on December 4, 2015

Chameleons know how to blend in

Chameleons know how to blend in
Image Credit: Teza Harinaivo Ramiandrisoa

I’ve got a difficult request for you. The good news is that if you can find a way to follow my instructions, you’ll become a better negotiator. What I’m going to want you to do is to be yourself in your next negotiation. However, at the same time I’m going to want you to be like a chameleon and blend into the negotiation. Think that you can do both at the same time?

Be Yourself

When you are engaged in a negotiation, the question will come up as to how you want to represent yourself to the other side of the table. You can completely focus on the issues that are on the table. In fact, this is what a lot of us do as we search for the negotiation styles and negotiating techniques that will get us the deal that we want. There is another way however. You can focus on the interests of the other side.

By taking this “bigger picture” of the negotiations, you will have the ability to bring your imagination and your vision to the table. This will allow you to bring the elements of your basic character and just a dash of your personal style into the negotiations. This should be considered to be the starting point as you figure out how you want to represent yourself in the negotiations.

The one thing that you don’t want to do is to come across as being false to the other side. This can happen if you decide to imitate someone else’s style. You need to be true to your background and your set of beliefs. When you use your genuine attributes, you will come across as an honest person and that will go a long way in helping to build trust with the other side of the table.

Be A Chameleon

Yes, your basic personality is a critical part of how the other side will see you and you need to be true to that part of you. However, at the same time, you need to understand that every negotiating situation that you find yourself in is going to require that you adapt your approach to that situation. This means that you are going to have to be very aware of both your surroundings and who you are negotiating with and make some changes.

What this means for you is that you’re going to end up having to tailor your particular negotiating style to the set of circumstances that you find yourself in. This can take on many different formats. One very good example has to do with humor. If the other side is being funny, then you are going to have to both be a good laugh-er and a funny person also in order to match them.

This is all about finding a balance between who you truly are and being a chameleon who is able to perfectly adapt to the negotiating environment that you find yourself in. You need to pay close attention to the type of language that is being used by the other side. If it consists of simple words, then keep your words simple. If the other side is making an effort to be friendly, then you need to make an effort to be friendly also. All of these actions taken together will allow you to find the right balance that will work for this negotiation.

What All Of This Means For You

In your next principled negotiation, you are going to want to bring a very personal style to the negotiating table. You have a personal style and that should be your starting point to get things started.

The one thing that you are not going to want to do in your next negotiation is to not be true to yourself. If you try to put on airs or use fancy words, the other side is going to see through you very quickly. What you do want to do is to be true to yourself. What you are going to want to try to do is to find a way to balance being you and simply blending in with the environment of the negotiation.

You need to learn to be true to yourself. Any fakery and the other side will eventually see though it and won’t want to deal with you. Stay true to yourself and blend in whenever possible. Get good at doing this and you’ll be able to strike big deals!

– Dr. Jim Anderson
Blue Elephant Consulting –
Your Source For Real World Negotiating Skills™

Question For You: What do you think is the best way to blend in during a negotiation?

Click here to get automatic updates when The Accidental Negotiator Blog is updated.

P.S.: Free subscriptions to The Accidental Negotiator Newsletter are now available. Learn what you need to know to do the job. Subscribe now: Click Here!

What We’ll Be Talking About Next Time

I’ve got a difficult request for you. The good news is that if you can find a way to follow my instructions, you’ll become a better negotiator. What I’m going to want you to do is to be yourself in your next negotiation. However, at the same time I’m going to want you to be like a chameleon and blend into the negotiation. Think that you can do both at the same time?

Be Sociable, Share!

{ 0 comments… add one now }

Leave a Comment

Previous post:

Next post: